Real questions you need to grapple with when writing a comic strip about stuffed animals:

1. Do they have any romantic interests?

2. If so, is that interest only in Squishables, or would they get down with, for example, an accent pillow?

3. If so, would the accent pillow be attractive to the Squishable because of a sexy accent, or are there limits to my punnery?

4. Ah du not theenk so, madame.

5. If they are only interested in Squishables, are they more specifically only interested in Squishables representing animals with which they would breed in non-plush form (like dragon with dragon, sheep with sheep, etc…).

6. Do they need to eat or drink?

7. If they do not need to eat or drink but can still ambulate, why wouldn’t they be captured by ruthless energy barons to be used as perpetual motion machines hooked up to big treadmills to generate electricity?

8. Wouldn’t free, endless and energy be a good thing, assuming we gave them breaks, good working conditions and a chance at a promotion?

9. Do they have or need money? If they don’t eat and housing is free, what would they spend it on? They certainly can’t reach the pedals of a car. Perhaps bus fare. There are certainly enough people on the bus who think they’re talking to imaginary animals already.

10. Assuming they can move around a little, what of the ones who don’t have feet, like the dolphin? Can they swim?

11. Could a Squishable enroll in school?

12. If so, would it have to pass gym?

Law school didn’t prepare me for this.